{augustus southwood: month 1}

i should be doing a post about the last few months on "modified activity", our move to portland, freedom from the previously mentioned "modified activity" and what it was like to be a normal pregnant girl, the birth story, or hundreds of other things that i haven't updated anyone on in a long time...but none of those things seem to matter now that we have our sweet little muffin face, Gus.  i also don't really want to relive those things now that i'm so focused on looking ahead to all the awesome memories we will make with our little man.  so, here's a few things i don't want to forget about Gus during his first month on earth.


-born on august 11th, 2015 at 6lbs 11.5 oz (corrected after they originally told us he was 5lbs 14.5 oz...that will be part of the birth story once i get to that someday)

-he left the hospital at 6lbs 3 oz, and at his first visit to the pediatrician the next day, he was 6lbs 4.5 oz

-2 week visit he was 6lbs 14.5 oz. 3.5 oz over his birth weight! he measured 21.5 inches long

-when we left the hospital, all was well with his jaundice levels. but on day 9, i thought he looked a little bit yellow, and so my mama instinct called the doc and they ordered a blood test...which revealed that sure enough he was struggling with his liver and his bilirubin levels were 21.9! they immediately rushed us to the hospital and had him under the bili lights for one night. (this should probably be it's own post...but i really don't want to focus on this nasty stuff anymore so i'll be brief with this.) when we left the hospital, he had gone down to a 14.2. two days later, i thought he was a little yellow again and sure enough he was BACK up to 18.4. the pediatrician ordered a take home "bili blanket" and we had him on that as much as possible for 4 nights. he went down to a 13.5, but then back up to 15.4. i was SOOOO worried because i just wanted his levels to go down naturally without help from the phototherapy. finally, i went in for a lactation appointment and another blood draw on thursday the 5th of september and he went down to a 14.2 on his own! the doc said once the levels go down, they won't go back up so we didn't have to have it checked again until 2 months.  finally, after battling this for almost 4 weeks...we could put the jaundice behind us.  i just wanted our little man to be happy and healthy.


gus is a very chill baby. aside from one night of gassiness in sunriver, he is almost always very content. sometimes i think that he's too content and something must be wrong with him because he almost never cries unless he needs something.  the one thing we did figure out was that he LOVES a soothie. i was of the belief that "my child will NOT have a soothie" but when i see how much it calms him down...i can't resist letting him have it.  if he doesn't have a soothie, he fights to find his hand, but with being uncoordinated still he often just gets frustrated and can't find it. i keep wondering if he does find it some day...if we will have a finger sucker!?! mama and dad can't complain about much. he's a damn good baby.


gus started sleeping longer chunks around 3 weeks old. he had hit his birth weight, so after setting my alarm to get up in the middle of the night to wake and feed him, i let him sleep. the first night he slept 5+ hours, i thought he was dead. i couldn't believe it. that was on Sept 3rd, so he was 3 weeks and 2 days old. since then, he's been sleeping 1 big chunk at the beginning of the night (between 4-6 hours), then waking up every 2-3 hours. it's usually a pretty early start (around 7-8 at night) and then he is up around midnight or 1 am and then again at 5 and usually 7 ish.  I feel like that's not terrible, considering he's only been in this world like 28 days!! i can't say for sure, but i'd like to hold myself to the fact that we will start sleep training after his 3 month mark. i think that means no soothie as well. ugh. that will be tough, but we will all be better for it in the end.


well, this really could be EVERYTHING since it was his first month on earth ...but i'll stick to just a few things.

-a bath: gus loves bath time. he gets so relaxed he proceeds to poop immediately following being taken out of the water. i was a careless first time mom and was so excited to snuggle up to him in his adorable froggy towel, smelling like a fresh and clean baby, and slowly massage him with lavender lotion...that suddenly i felt a gush of hot liquid. sure enough. he'd shat on me. other than that, he doesn't cry until you take him OUT of the bath. otherwise he just lays there in pure ecstasy....even when the water spills on his face. i love it as well because it calms him and it's also a nice time to bond when i'm not being a milk machine, changing a diaper ,or soothing him. 

-roadtrip: we went to sunriver on saturday the 5th of september. it was the week he would turn 1 month old. he was a total champ on the way down, and slept basically the whole time except for when i MADE him eat.  while there, he was amazing except for 1 night where he acted totally bizarre and wouldn't stop crying. i was about 2 seconds away from going to the hospital (because i was super sick from a cold that was going around the house, and i thought for sure he was coming down with it) but it turned out to probably be just gas. he finally fell asleep on me, and the next day he was back to his calm and sleepy self. we took him on long walks to the village,happy hour to the lodge, and even to mexican food for dinner. he was an angel during all of them.

-a trip to nordstroms: we went on our first trip to nordys and had a blast. i think we spent about 4 hours there (which included a feed.) everyone wanted to look at him, and tell me how cute he was, which i was happy to listen to. i think he likes nordstrom as much as his mama.

-meeting his cousins: we went to my sisters house on a sunday evening when the man was out of town, and had pizza and some cousin bonding time. his oldest cousin jake (talked about on my sis's blog here) was enamored with gus, and wanted to "hold him" and pat him. it was probably one of the sweetest moments he had this month, and i can't wait for so many more to come! cousin time is perfection.  

how mama feels:

emotionally:  this is a tough one. there are so many emotions that i've had in the last month. utter happiness, to sheer exhaustion, and then with a lot of worry thrown in between and all around. when you have a kid, it's like your body takes every emotion and throws them together and you never know quite when they are going to come out.  i cry when i'm happy, sad, excited or worried, and also when i'm overly tired or feeling great.  it makes no sense. 

physically: honestly, i have to write this down for me to remember on #2, but the 1.5-2 week mark hit and i suddenly felt SO MUCH BETTER. but before that, i thought i was going to never feel the same.  my nether regions just felt HUGE. like i was sitting on a balloon that was filled with shards of glass. and let's be truthful....the hemmies. oh man. they are no joke. i think that during the pushing part of my delivery, i popped out another 3. but now sitting here at a month in, and i don't know if i can even feel 1! bless time that heals the body.  

breastfeeding: this is by far the toughest part about being a new mom. well, that and the lack of sleep. but i think that breastfeeding may take the cake because you KNOW that your babies well being rests on the fact that you are able to feed them. gus was a STRONG sucker from the minute he came out. almost to a fault. he was also a chomper. per my amazing lactation woman Doris, she said that he was very tight on his left side because of the vacuum hematoma left on his head, and the overall stress of coming out quickly. this caused him to tire easily and chomp on my nipple.  after several trips to the lactation clinic, numerous midnight feedings where i just thought to myself "think of something else aside from your burning nipples and fight through the pain. your baby needs this" accompanied with some tears and thoughts to the dark side of "i don't think i can do this,"  things changed.   gus loosened up his grip, and my nipples started to get a little bit tougher. now, things are going much more smoothly...except that the shower and towels are my nemesis. two things i used to love. .  but let's be honest...there are a lot of things i used to love that i can't do anymore. but it's worth every penny for the little man.

and one more thing i don't want to forget is that i'm off dairy due to gus being a little sensitive with gas. will update next month and see if there is a difference with his behavior. crossing my fingers this works.  

so that's it for month 1. there will be more actual gus updates when he starts doing much more interesting things like smiling and cooing and stuff. 

here are some pictures from our first month together as a family of 3.

{gus outtakes}